Love is Worth Working On

Sigmund Freud liked to talk about love and work. He described both as being powerful motivators for what we do and why we do it. When he talked  about work he wasn't talking merely about a 9-5 job we do just for a paycheck, but rather a desire to be productive and do something of value.


The love of work and the work of love are things that are sadly all too often overlooked in today's world. In reality to truly work takes love and to truly love takes work.


It's often said that if you love what you do you won't work a day in your life. Work can be torture or it can be something that fills you with joy, pride, and a sense of accomplishment. If you don't enjoy your work you may find yourself staring at the clock all day long. You may find yourself  daydreaming when you should be working. You may be less productive and not as helpful to others as you could be. You may also be unhappy, stressed out, and physically drained at the end of each day.

On the other hand if you love your work you find yourself eager to start the day, happy, and looking forward to what lies ahead. You don't think about the time, daydream about being somewhere else, or find yourself depressed and lethargic. You'll find that your work actually motivates you to keep moving ahead and energizes you. You'll be friendlier to others and more helpful to those around you. You feel confident in yourself and your abilities. If there's something you can't do it becomes a welcome challenge and not a frustrating obstacle. We should all be so fortunate as to find work that makes us feel this way.


As for love, it is more than a feeling. When we think of love we often imagine things magically falling into place. While love certainly does entail a degree of magic or destiny, it's also something that needs to be nurtured, taken care of, and given attention. Love is not a one-time event. Love if it's going to last requires action.


When you love a person you want to actively make them happy, feel appreciated, and know in their heart exactly how you feel. Love isn't meant to be put on the back shelf. Love is meant to be displayed, shared, and enjoyed to its fullest extent. Love means being willing to  compromise, to open your heart to someone, and to allow yourself to be vulnerable. It means that when you have a disagreement you find a way to work things out so that nobody feels cheated. Instead of having a fight with a winner and a loser, you have a discussion where you both feel heard and satisfied with the outcome.


You don't have to work at love- but is that the kind of love you want to have? Love isn't always easy, but when it's true love it's worth it.

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